Thanks-Giving.. .

    Are we "Thankful" for the table decorated for the festive hoilday, or the people that are in our day to day lives . To me "Thanks-Giving" has become more than a hoilday about eating our favorite foods, or who's coming to dinner. The older I get, an especially since my recent illness in September this Thanksgiving was full of love, gratitude, and grace. Love for all the people that are in life, that has impacted me and made me a better person. Gratitude  for Heavenly Father allowing me to contuine to live my life on this side of the veil , with my family . And I am also grateful for the knowledge that when we die life goes on for us. There is so much love that encompasses us as pass through the veil, the love ones that have gone on before us waiting there. Most of all for our Savior Jesus Christ, that laid his life down so we may raise ours up once again, so we all can return back to our Heavenly Father. Grace to allow me to be able to put others before myself. To serve my fellow man kind with a open loving heart..
    This Thanksgiving was a start of a new tradition for me and my family. For I was in charge of cooking an preparing this meal this year all on my own. Something my mother has waited for the last 16yrs for, and something I've dreaded to do for fear of screwing up everyone's hoilday. But this year I was bound and determined to do it so my parents could just enjoy the day .Their health hasnt been the greatest this year so I thought it was time to allow them just to enjoy the day and NOT worry about cooking or cleaning for a bunch of us.
         For you see traditions run deep in our families, every year its the same food with the same stories behind them of when, where and why we started making them. These are the things that I enjoy and find comfort in. As I make mashpototes I hear my baby sister whisper in my ear, "you know you can add more butter and milk to that right?" Lisa has been gone from this earth for the last 15 years, and yet everytime I make mashpotoes I hear her voice whisper that in my ear. Yes, its a memory but a dear one. Chocolate pie is my favorite pie, but it was also my Daddy Gibbs favorite too .. I didnt make it this year because of my diabetes being crazy but I did think of him .. Every year as I lay the deviled eggs on the plate that belonged to my Nanny Clark, I see her smiling.. for you see over 25 yrs ago she when on to be with our Heavenly Father. I know they are waiting on me for I saw them and talked to them during my coma in September. I truly beleive that I will be reunited with my family on the other side of the veil, but for now I'll bring thier memories with me as I cook each hoilday meal.. I cant wait to have Mommy Gibbs punch come New Years..

When it rains..

When it rains all I want to do is curl up in a good book, or snuggle in bed with the one I love.. That goes back to my childhood, the deepest memories of cabin with my beloved Aunt and Uncle. Listening to the sounds of the rain hitting the tin roof as we were camping.

Then when Charles and I first married , we had bought a trailer.. I loved laying in bed snuggling with my babies as the rain blew outside. These are the memories that I hold dear to my heart , as the play through my brain now on another cold rainy day.

Instead of snuggling with my babies , I have my laptop as music plays quietly in the distance. Life changes, babies grow and unfortunately people that we love dearly leave us , and we find ourselves saying goodbye. The one thing that I have learned in the last month is that the veil between life and death is very thin. We come down to this planet only to leave the only home we had ever known, leave the presence of our Heavenly Father. SO full of light , love we came here to take upon our mortal bodies and all the lessons that we are meant to be here. This is a poem that was read at my sisters funeral over sixteen years ago, but its so full of love, I just had to share.

To All Parents
"I'll lend you for a while a child of mine,"
He said.
"For you to love the while she lives and mourn for
when she's dead.
It may be six or seven years, or twenty-two or
three,
But will you, till I call her back, take care of
her for me?
She'll bring her charms to gladden you, and should
her stay be brief,
You'll have her lovely memories as solace for
your grief.
I cannot promise she will stay; since all from
earth return,
But there are lessons taught down there I
want this child to learn.
I've looked the wide world over in My search
for teachers true
And from the throngs that crowd life's lanes
I have selected you.
Now will you give her all your love, not think
the labor vain, Nor hate Me when I come to call to take her back again?"
I fancied that I that I heard them say, "Dear Lord,
Thy will be done!
For all the joy Thy child shall bring, the
risk of grief we run.
We'll shelter her with tenderness, we'll
love her while we may,
And for the happiness we've known, forever
grateful stay;
But should the angels call for her much sooner
than we've planned,
We'll brave the bitter grief that comes and
try to understand."
~Unknown

I pray that I never have to live through the grief of burying my own child, and my heart breaks for those of you  that had to bear . But it is so close that veil and when we cross over that great divide they are their waiting on us. When we walk from the darkness into the bright light full of love, an peace we will know that our journey, trials and lessons that we had to face here on earth will be worth it in the end.. So just remember no matter how difficult the storm, return with honor back to our home in Heaven .We lived their once and will return again if we have lived with honor..

A Must Read..

One of my dearest friends is now a published author. Its based loosely on life experiances and awesome Christian Values ..Please Check him out.. and keep on passing the Word along..
http://www.briankperry.com/runaway.html

Changes...

Changes…
As I sit here listening to, “The House That Built Me” by Miranda Lambert. Memories rush through my mind, memories of my childhood and all those that are no longer here. I am not the same person as I was the day I was born or even the day I went into the hospital on that rainy September night.
Many things has changed inside my soul, for once in my life I am not trying to please the people that are in my life, I am living only to please my God, My family and Myself. These are the only people I answer to know in my life. I may be someone’s daughter but I am no longer a child. I have the agency that Heavenly Father gave me to make choices.
I have realized that I don’t want to have regrets when I close my eyes for the last time. As I face the eternities I don’t want to have regrets of should’ve done... or could’ve done. . I want to know inside my heart and soul that I lived my life to the fullest never slowing down or giving up on my hopes and dream. I will take my life by the reigns and be in control of it... There isn’t a man on this earth that I am afraid of and the only Judge I have to answer to is my family, and Heavenly Father. A family that I answer to consist of my husband, and children. I know that people may think I have lost it and that I’m going crazy but life is short, too short to live it in misery.
I leave a final question with you, my love ones … If you were to take your last breathe on earth tonight .what would be the one thing you would regret not doing.. SO all that I ask of you, the ones that I love, is either come on this journey with me, or love me in spite of my choices.
Comments are encouraged and most welcome.. leave me your thoughts

Pre- Existance

Within the preceding week, overcoming death has turned my thoughts to the other side of the veil. My heart is full; my mind is abundant with the Spirit. I want to share with you my friends and family what is impression unto my soul. I reminisce about going to Time Out for Women a couple of years ago. I can remember sensitivity to the awesome spirit in that room, and hearing Sister Nelson tell us that," if only we had a Pre-Existence dvd” So if we could remember all the promises that we made with our Heavenly Father before we came to Earth." I also remember Michael Wilcox talking about," how we are divine Spirit daughters of our Heavenly Father and how we are exceptional generation. We are here on this Earth at this time in all of time, because our Heavenly Father knows we can handle the temptations and overcome them to return back to him."
Those words were powerful then but I tell you my friends they are more powerful know as I look back on all I have overcame. I know that without a shadow of doubt without the Priesthood power that is alive on this earth and prayers from all around the world that I received I would have not made it back from the Coma. I had a testimony before the Coma but now my “Testimony” is concrete, unmovable. I wish I could have avoided all that but do I regret the outcome no… I have always said your funeral; all those in attendance signifies how well you lived your life. How many you loved and were loved in return. The unfortunate side effect of life is that many people live this life pondering if their lives mean anything, wondering if they are loved by those they love..
Well my beloved friends I can tell you that I know without a shadow of doubt that I am loved, that my ultimate accomplishment in this life will not be the millions I make in a board room but my beautiful daughters that Heavenly Father gave me to raise . I will raise them with a higher determination because life is not about how many millions you make but about how many souls you help lead back to Our Father In Heaven.
Right now I feel closer to my love ones that I have traversed that Veil, I guess I know how truly thin it is. I believe that within one heartbeat we all could be reunited. I know that I have a resolve under Heaven and I am not ready to go anywhere.
The time upon this world is short, the temptations that will rise are greater than anyone has ever derived across that has existed upon this earth. Satan is the great deceiver, once the most magnificent angel in Heaven, he choose to become the author of all lies. He chose to create a war within Heaven and took 1/3 of all the angels with him. We are different than those angel we have “agency”, we can choose right or wrong.
In order to endure this world we will have to stay in our scriptures, and on our knees in prayer. I am so thankful that I have the privilege of believing that there is a Modern Day Prophet and I can follow his direction for my family and my life. Prophet Monson will warn us of things that are forthcoming that could attack our families. Satan will try to hit us in our weakest spot with these temptations and it will not be so apparent. It could be a weakness that we thought we had overcome. I urge my loved ones to stay in prayer, keep our families united as one .For there is nothing on this side of veil that is worth losing your family over. Families are forever, what is bound on earth will be bound in Heaven. (Through proper Priesthood authority)
There is nothing paramount then being a Beloved Spirit daughter of my Heavenly Father I recognize that he loves me, and wants what is best for me. I identify that the time on this earth is short; I am here to learn the things that I need to learn in this physical body. Earth is the separation from our Spirit bodies and our Heavenly Father. It is our job to go through the things that will lead us back to the eternities.
I didn’t mean to go on a tirade my dear ones but with time on my hands and my heart brimming with the Spirit of my Heavenly Father who knows what will derive out of these hands as I typed into this keyboard. May we all be found faithful and return with honor to our Father in Heaven. Until next time I set words to paper..
All my love goes with you who read this. May your hearts be filled with love, and your families united under the Heavens.
Rata..

The Final Acts of Life..

Have you ever wondered what happens when we close our eyes for the final time? I know that this week I came very close to experiancing what is on "the Other Side" Not out of what my church beliefs are, or how I lived my life but honestly it all plays into that. I know that we have a Kind gracious loving Heavenly Father that is patiently loving and watching over us from the other side of veil.
I will tell you it is very strange to go to sleep one night , and be declared unresponsive. I came very close to not waking up on this side of eternity but on the "other Side" .. Believe me when you have been through an experience like this it puts your priorities in life. My only thoughts were of my husband, my children , my family and friends. It can not imagine what that phone call was like on the end that my dearest friend answered, " Hello this is Kings Daughter's Medical Center .. .are you.. are you her POA shes non-responsive. " Yes I am glad that at 35 I had the paper work in to play for years. That I had expressed my wishes to my family and especially to my best friend to answered that call.  It was paper work that I never thought I would have to use but I am so thankful to have it into place. I am thankful for all the love an support that has flooded from around the world for me and my family.
I am thankful that Prayers are still answered and Jesus Christ still performs miracles upon this earth today. Yes it is a primary theme, but it is the theme of my life , I personally know that Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ is still in the miracles business . I am living breathing proof of that , 48 hrs ago I was in ICU not responding to anyone. Today I am setting at home with my family, my children and waiting for my hubby to walk through the door.. I am not ready to leave this life , but I do have the security of knowing that whether I am here or on the other side by family is with me loving me..  FAMILIES  ARE FOREVER AND APART OF HEAVENLY FATHER'S PLAN..

Endless Summer days..

So you ever wish you could just have endless summer days to spend with your children and love ones.. Well today I took that moment just for me. Today my husband and our children meet one of my best friends down at the Park .. It was amazing just to take time out of our day to day crazy lives and watch the children play. Granted it was more like watching hers play an keeping tabs on the teenagers..  I remember the times when it was myself chasing after little ones insted of trying to get my cell away from teenagers. Life goes by so quicky at time but it was wonderful all of us getting sprayed by the water as it jetts up from the ground.. With in a blink of an eye these stumbling toddlers , and elementary smart mouths turn into teenage drama queens and quarter backs of the football team.
So my request is that you enjoy each minute of the day , love the ones your with cause before your very eyes time will fly by.. Time changes we all grow up, out into the worlds and make sure the one you love will love you back through enternity...