Life's little miracles...

To me life is full of little miracles, chances to share the love you feel with the people around you, and no matter how crappy your day has been there will always be someone in there willing to either
                                                                  1.)Stab you in the back
                                                                  2.) or pick you up when you fall. ..
      I am lucky to say that I have more of the number 2 people in my life which is fanastic .. I love my family, yes you know who you are and just because we have the same blood running through our veins that does not make us family.. My family , the ones I would die or kill for are the ones that I have created out of love, that I am bonded to till the day I die..
      I feel so blessed to have amazing women, mothers, best friends ( whom are as close to me as sisters ) in my life.. I love my girls that I can call anytime , day or night an they are always there to listen  to my fears, wipe away my tears and reassure me that life will get better..  They love me, and support me no matter how stupid I act, no matter how I royally screw up or even when I can become an hateful psychotic WITCH. ..Yes, even I have my Bi-polar days.. I am bi-polar.. not really but there are days where I cant even stand my self not counting the world around me.. An these amazing friends call and say Hey .. I LOVE YOU .. when I need it the most. OR setting down to a spur of the moment Lunch date with my besties.... Makes the days alot brighter..
          Is it sad that I still have my Returned Missionaries on my speed dial?? These amazing men and women changed my family forever, they changed me for the better.. I was so unhappy, struggling to find peace in a choatic world.. They have shown me that love this unconditonal , that when you tell someone something it stays there, an there is no judgement calls made.. These people has seen us at nearly are worst and still loved us, still supported us.. and still do to this day even if theyre on the opposite coast.. :( You can still be seperated by distance, and still be loved... I love my West Coast family with all my heart.. I miss your beautiful smililing faces an please know that your in my thoughts ,prayers and heart every day that I breath..

           Last night I recieved a little miracle, one of my long lost daugthers came home.. I can not even find the words to express how much love and gratitude that my heart is overflowing.. This child was there for me when my world fell apart, an everyone walked out the door.. but she would lay in bed with me for hours keeping me company , making sure I stayed sane.. there was many a nights that we would just lay there an talking into the wee hours of the morning. .It was so nice just to be able to lay there and make fun of the fact that there's nothing on the tv at 5am.. even with 400 channels ( ok maybe not 400 but with the satellite it feels that way.. ) I love her as if I had given birth to her myself, there isnt anything that  I wouldnt do for her.. I am glad that shes back HOME where I know shes safe..
        Life is good on the homefront.. I may have only given birth to three beautiful daughters, that I am so proud to be there Momma.. but I am thankful for the many, many that I have had the pleasure in my life to love, and be loved in return.. the most amazing part of being a Mother is seeing your babies grow up into fanastic women.. Women that your proud of and best friends with. Dont get me wrong my girls know that I love them I would always have their backs no matter what, but when it comes time to either be their Momma or best friend. Momma wins hands down everytime, for I was charged with the responsiblity of thier precious souls, making sure they turn out to be loving productive adults.. So today I am rejoicing in this little miracles that occur in our lives, that no matter how dark the storm rages there will always be a rainbow in the end..There will always be blessing at the end of the darkest trials.. We are not alone , living our lives we have a Heavenly Father who loves us and wants what is best for us.. Thanks to my family, my besties and all my Children .. for without you I would be the person  I am . an guess what I kind love me..

One Day at a Time

As I step into the world that our Heavenly Father created for us, there are no promises of tomorrow.. There is no one that is going  to be my personally cheerleading squad.. but there are my friends, the ones that I have a greater bond with than the ones that have the same blood rushing through thier veins. We were put on this planet for a reason, to return back to our Heavenly Father. I know as my children grow older , I slowly handing them over the reins of thier lives.So they can face the consquences of thier choices and it terrifies me..I'm thier mother I love them, I just want to protect them. But they are not babies anymore, I can not hold them an make all thier choices for them .. They have to learn because there is going to be a that they will have familes of thier own.. So my dear friends , as you bring those innocent babies into this world... take lots of pictures, take time out of each just just to hold them in your arms.. because within a blink of your eyes they are going to be adults on their own.. love u..
One day at time, I will walk hand in hand with my Savior Jesus Christ.. I will read the "stories" of his journey here on earth, so that I may be able to return back to our Father ..I am thankful that Families are forever..

Changes.. the great circle that we call LIFE

This week has been full of love, laugther and even pain. This week has been full of emotional ups and downs. We had an amazing Christmas, we rocked in the New Year with Party atmosphere, streams necklaces, blowing horns , amazing food and full of great friends! This year was about Celebrating what we could have lost in the Robinette household, for just a few short months ago I was closer to the other side of the veil than I was here.. I was determined to have my family by myside, laughing all the way into 2011.. for it was a very real reality that if it wasnt for the mercy of my Heavenly Father I wouldnt be here to Celebrate with them.
Times like these when I set down with my laptop, an Pandora blaring out of the speakers I would almost swear that I was mutliple personality.. I have my quick mix blaring as I find my 'zone' to let my heart pour out on to this page, to let you inside to depths of my soul.. Here you will find no hidden secrets, no last regrets, no words left spoken but it will be your choice if you want to read them or not.. (http://www.pandora.com/people/stevens2robinette96 ) My musical range is as varied as my friends, you may never know what you will find me listening to as I write , clean or just want some me time..
 As we entered into the last day of 2010, I recieved a phone call that a human being we all dread. I hear my dear friend, no in reality she is my sister, call me to tell me that her father passed away this morning.. We knew he was in a battle , and one that he most likely would not win.. But as a child , you believe your parents are super heros with super powers.. That there isnt anything they can not conquer ,even a little thing called death will not be able to hold them down.
My views on death has always been strange to others, but to me they are even more defined since my experiance in September. I can remember being in the dark place surrounded by nothing but peace an love that incompassed your whole being .You thinking of nothing but drawing closer to that light, love, and peace. Your thoughts are not of this world, not of what your leaving behind but what is waiting for you.. For you see at the end of the dark tunnel I saw my Sister, My Aunt and Uncle (whom I love as my parents) ..they were waiting for me love shining through them, all  I wanted to do was reach out to them, to embrace them for it has been so long since Ive held them in my arms. But before I could get within reaching distance of my beautiful baby sister she held out her hand in front as if to stop me.. Thats when I thought of my children, of my family that I would leave behind.. That is when I started fighting . I know my family is eternal, I know that we must say goodbye for a short time. We are not promised an amount of time upon this earth, but we are responsible for how we live them.
Sitting in Charlies funeral (Nancy's daddy) I thought not of what we had lost on this earth but what he had gained beyond that veil. He was ready to return back to his Heavenly Father, the giving of his life, the Master of his Eternal life.. We may have lost a loving father, but he returned back into the presence of HIS Father that gave him eternal life. I mourn his loss for his daughter, but I rejoice with him for the blessing he recieved intering into the presense of our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ.. I can almost hear them say Enter In my Child Well Done.. You fought a good fight, and ran your race.. Now its time to take your rest.. One day that is a path that we will all walk , we will not walk it alone if we have taken upon the "Name of Jesus Christ" through his atonement. He will lead us home , for he came to save the world, to give us a way to return back into the GLory of Heavenly Father's presence. With this knowledge I say a simple prayer.. That as grief, trials and tribulations come to you in this life do not let it over take you.. Do not let it steal you from the presence of your Savior Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father, they have loved us since Time began.. I leave you with this scripture Psalm 91 1-16...
Until we meet again, I leave thee with my love  ...

Chipmunks-we wish you a merry christmas

Its Christmas Time .....

All the house is decorated, the stockings are hung, the tree is up full of tinsel and joy. This year decorating our tree was a fun experiance for the first time since I became a mother the whole house pitched in , decorating was the number one priority on everyone's mind. Each one of my girls had a "Special" place that decorations had to .. It was blast with Christmas music blaring out the speakers on the computer from "Pandora" the candle and jasmine incense light with such care in hopes that the Holiday spirit would soon be found there..

Each ornament that was pulled out of the box represented parts of our lives , memories of time esclipsed forever. Each one of our children has recieved a ornament every year from the time of thier birth, for the plan you see is that when they leave Mommy and Daddy's they would have something of thier "childhood" in thier homes.. Starting out with just a bit of thier past with them. There are so many stories, each can remember where they were when they opened that special present. My husband and I decided years ago that a Star would top our tree every year for the "star" that brought light into this dark world when a newborn baby was born in that stable.. Each passing year as my children grow older, and the ones that I love passing into the veil. So I have an angel from "the Drake Collection" that my husband brought our oldest daughter years ago when doll collecting was her phase.. But yet it reminds me of my beautiful sister who will be spending her 15th Christmas in Heaven. So I now take time that to recongnize all the love ones that are here with me now , and those who are watching over me from above. I thank my Heavenly Father for giving me this wonderful life, for sending his son to give us a choice of eternal life.. Families are together forever, yet its a choice for us.. SO when we set down for those presents around the tree, enjoy those who are assembled around the tree more than what's under the tree. For presents can be bought anytime of the year, but sometimes life is short and fleeting..
Ok , you have listened to my rambling now, so I just want to wish you a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS and Happy New Year.. .

My Favorite Blogger is....

I MUST say that http://latterdaychatter.blogspot.com/
is the best in the world..

Thanks-Giving.. .

    Are we "Thankful" for the table decorated for the festive hoilday, or the people that are in our day to day lives . To me "Thanks-Giving" has become more than a hoilday about eating our favorite foods, or who's coming to dinner. The older I get, an especially since my recent illness in September this Thanksgiving was full of love, gratitude, and grace. Love for all the people that are in life, that has impacted me and made me a better person. Gratitude  for Heavenly Father allowing me to contuine to live my life on this side of the veil , with my family . And I am also grateful for the knowledge that when we die life goes on for us. There is so much love that encompasses us as pass through the veil, the love ones that have gone on before us waiting there. Most of all for our Savior Jesus Christ, that laid his life down so we may raise ours up once again, so we all can return back to our Heavenly Father. Grace to allow me to be able to put others before myself. To serve my fellow man kind with a open loving heart..
    This Thanksgiving was a start of a new tradition for me and my family. For I was in charge of cooking an preparing this meal this year all on my own. Something my mother has waited for the last 16yrs for, and something I've dreaded to do for fear of screwing up everyone's hoilday. But this year I was bound and determined to do it so my parents could just enjoy the day .Their health hasnt been the greatest this year so I thought it was time to allow them just to enjoy the day and NOT worry about cooking or cleaning for a bunch of us.
         For you see traditions run deep in our families, every year its the same food with the same stories behind them of when, where and why we started making them. These are the things that I enjoy and find comfort in. As I make mashpototes I hear my baby sister whisper in my ear, "you know you can add more butter and milk to that right?" Lisa has been gone from this earth for the last 15 years, and yet everytime I make mashpotoes I hear her voice whisper that in my ear. Yes, its a memory but a dear one. Chocolate pie is my favorite pie, but it was also my Daddy Gibbs favorite too .. I didnt make it this year because of my diabetes being crazy but I did think of him .. Every year as I lay the deviled eggs on the plate that belonged to my Nanny Clark, I see her smiling.. for you see over 25 yrs ago she when on to be with our Heavenly Father. I know they are waiting on me for I saw them and talked to them during my coma in September. I truly beleive that I will be reunited with my family on the other side of the veil, but for now I'll bring thier memories with me as I cook each hoilday meal.. I cant wait to have Mommy Gibbs punch come New Years..