Life is a great circle full of movement , and Road blocks..

While visiting a dear friend of mine this past week I noticed stenciled on her wall, FAMILY , A JOURNEY TO ENTERITY.. *or something to that affect for I was quite emotional * ..

Well any who that has gotten this mind of my whirling.. For I am one of those that personally believe that we lived in Heaven before we came down here to take upon this mortal body.. And before I start rambling into Primary Songs, I know that live is hard , its full of roadblocks, heck even our own personal Hurricanes and tornado's .. We may not be affected by them physically but we can be emotionally, mentally or even spiritually..  I think the ones that know me best, know I have been in the middle of my own Spiritual hurricane.. An I like anyone who has ever survived a hurricane knows I battened down the hatches around my heart, my home , my family..

I have never been on to be an open book to others, to be able to ask for support if I truly needed or even let people know I was drowning.. My life has been full of love, laughter and even devastation, There has been many things that I have overcame , that would have killed a lesser woman.. I am not being boastful or arrogant .. I am just simply stating the things that I have overcame in this lifetime would warp your mind if you allowed it.. But once I had my beautiful daughter my survival became for most in my life, for I had to survive to take care of her.. She was my world, my very reason or existing.. All three of my children are, even when they’re trying my patience and turning me grey.. 

Looking over the last 4 years of my life there has been many changes, many ups and downs. Some of them blow my mind or I couldn’t imagine how empty my life, and my family would have been without some of these blessings… How people I didn’t know Four years ago , I would lay my life down for now if they needed it.. I am thankful for the love and support you all have shown me, an brand new world I never knew existed.. For when you say your love someone they actually mean it.. For people showing they love ,support me without wanting to hurt me or something first for them selves.

Granted I would love to take away some of the challenges that we have had , and continue to have but one thing I've learned is that even when we are walking into our own personal “living nightmare or hellish existence” Heavenly Father is always there with us loving us and wanting us to turn to him.. Sometimes when we pray its not that he’s not listening .. its just that the answer is not for our benefit so that’s why we are getting silence. . He loves us so much an only wants things for our benefit.. I am thankful for my Heavenly Father who is bedside me each step of the way on this side of mortality and waiting for me on the other side of immortality For when this race is finished I know that my home will be with my loved ones.. I am so Thankful that I know that Families are Forever.. .

Changes an Self Reflection

I am not the biggest fan of Changes, whether those changes are good for me or bad.. I have such a hard time letting people in and get close to me , for my biggest fear is rejection. Of loving someone and not being loved in returned. So If you have breached the wall that I have been around myself “Congratulations” because its not easy but yet its not something I can change.

One of my greatest quirks about myself that I am starting to find as one of my greatest strengths … Is that I tell you exactly what I am thinking.. an Feeling (most of the time LOL) the feeling part is still a great work in progress.. I am so tired of all the people whom seem to think that your life is their business, and if you don’t let them into your life they just make up an spread lies about you anyway.. I’ve been out of High School an long time now and yet some people never out grow that mentality of “Clicks” or destroying other people with their mouths. I am usually very tolerant of their stupidity but once they drag my children or family into their drama I See “RED” and all complete rational thought go out of my brain an my mouth goes into over-drive .. Yes I do see that as a flaw and I am currently working on the problem..

Life is crazy hard enough without other people trying to drag other people down.. So please encourage, love other people and like your mother told you ( or if she didn’t I will ) if you have NOTHING good to say then Say NOTHING at all. You don’t know what other people are experiencing in their lives, you don’t know their heartaches, stress or even medical problems .. so learn to leave your comments to yourself unless its full of love an appreciation for life is too short for all the DRAMA!!!